Mother of Bullied Daughter Responds

First let me say 'Thank You."

 

Thank you all for your support & concern for my Daughter Monique.

 

Where do I even start?

Tuesday evening when Monique, my Mother Alexa & I went to the BOE meeting, we knew there were going to be tears. While waiting for our three minutes, I knew Monique was very nervous. Never had she spoken in public. She's a very shy & private girl who makes me so very proud.

 

This whole bullying thing has continued since Sept 7, 2010 and is so very sad to me. I feel like I'm at a loss right now. My job is to protect my Daughter at all times so in a way I feel like I've let her down. You send your child out the door 5 days a week to attend school which is supposed to be the next safest place-in my eyes. Yet those 5 days are the worst times in her life right now. There's not one person at Woodrow Wilson Middle School who can stop the bullying on their time. I just don't get it!  So my Daughter has to suffer because no one wants to do the right thing and remove the bullies. Right now, all I'm looking for is a Tutor until the BOE finds a new school for Monique, at their expense. My child needs a fresh start ASAP.

 

As I sit here and read all of your comments, I have a knot in my throat and of course, tears. What do I do??? Is there anybody who can help Monique? Did my Mother & I miss something? What aren't we doing right? Who else are we supposed to contact? I just don't get it!  So many tears we have cried, together and alone, yet nothing has changed. I lay down next to Monique at night, holding her and telling her that no matter how long it takes, we're going to make it stop. But at the same time I can't tell her WHEN it's going to stop.

 

The friends Monique has from Kindergarten, the ones that she really thought would be there for her, NOW say "You have all these people defending you but you won't fight. Yeah. So I can't be your friend if you won't fight". She really feels alone now.

Our family has such a long paper trail, back to the very first day it all started, over a HAIRSTYLE!! Yes, a hairstyle that a bully wore first. Ironically, the bully who started all this moved to New Britain in October! But before she moved, she had recruited a bunch of girls but, like an infestation, the numbers kept growing with new girls. She can no longer walk down the hallways without someone calling her a 'pig',  or saying she's ugly, or that she looks like a boy or your hair is nappy or your clothes are dirty. They tripped her, threw things at her, poured syrup in her hair, threw food in her face & what is really sad to me is that Monique sat there the whole time while this was being done, too embarrassed to get up in front of everyone & walk away.

 

My child is beautiful, has clean clothes, with hair down to her butt; so my guess is they're all just jealous. What else could it be? She's never been in a fight, never had a detention and she is a really good kid. Monique is not disrespectful at all and has manners. These kids who bully her need to leave her the hell alone!

 

After the BOE Meeting, I got a mesage from one bully saying, "I'm so sorry. I just saw Monique on TV. I had no idea she felt tht way. When I go back to school tomorrow I'm going to tell everyone, even my friends, to stop bullying her. Well, I don't know what happened the next day at school, Wednesday, what that child said, but everyone is now calling Monique a 'snitch' again for going to the BOE Meeting and speaking, even trhough she never said any of their names. I was told that 4 more girls who had nothing to do with this, now want to fight  Monique. Like what? Are you kidding me?  They want to label Monique a snitch because she comes home and tells me how her day went and I always address it?  If that's a snitch, then so be it.

 

Regarding the threatening messages that Monique received, my Daughter set up that account back in 2009 and as soon as she told me, (she never asked me) I told her I didn't want her to have one! Monique's last status was dated 9/11/09 and it said: "Luv my Life".

 

The message that Ed typed for you to read was off of that status.  I didn't know how to delete the page. That's why it's still up there.

 

I could write all day, but you can get the sense of what we are dealing with and all I would like is for my child to be able to go to school and be safe while she is there.  She's already missed out on alot of her school activities, dances, the basketball games - because of course she didn't want to deal with the bullies after school so she just took the bus home.

 

Some of you ask where the parents are. Your guess is as good as mine. It does say alot about the household they are running. I know that.

 

My Mother and I were told that if we kept Monique out of school, be prepared for DCF to come knocking at my door. On Wednesday, my Mother and I went down to DCF with our paper trail in hand. The woman at DCF said we really had nothing to worry about and we were doing the right thing if the school could not protect my Daughter. That was nice to hear.

 

So, where do we go from here? I guess we have to wait for the BOE to respond. They have 20 days to call a meeting and then they have another 5 days to implement the solution. I think that's too long.  But who am I?  Just a concerned mother who needs answers and help for my daughter!

 

Once again, Thank You to everyone for your kind words.

 

I don't see the light right now but I sure hope there is one at the end ot this tunnel.

 

Alycia M McClain

Monique's Mom