Friday, April 13, 2012

Mortally wounded ⇔Spiritually alive.

Mortally Wounded,
Spiritually Alive

Some years ago, during a time of family trials, a friend counselled me on my state of mind. He said, you know, if you're going to have any "highs," which I know you do, you can not escape the lows. He said, only a person who is spiritually unresponsive or emotionally unresponsive is not going to experience feeling really bad sometimes. It's a bit of a paradox.

But I had to admit, it made sense. Even in a pretty miserable state, a small part of me could understand that the reason it hurt so bad was that I was able to feel bad.... not that I wanted to feel bad. But, imagine if you just went through your life not feeling too bad ... or too good. Living life in grey, as if in a fog. I had to admit I didn't think I would like that.

In some oblique way, that's how I have come to view the crucifixion and the resurrection. It may not be the way it's taught or the way it's explained traditionally, but I see the reason for the resurrection as the summation of all our trials and woes--the worst possible punishment in the worst possible world (crucifixion). And yet.

And yet, there is the resurrection, the spiritual renewal, the indication that we are spiritually alive enough to feel. And I really don't think you can have one without the other.

I suppose there are many ways of understanding or stating this idea. I don't know why, but I started thinking of mathematical symbols, the kind that gave me so much trouble in the logic of the so-called new math.

Mortally wounded  ≈  Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded ◅  Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded   Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded  ≈  Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded  Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded  Spiritually alive.
Mortally wounded ⇔ Spiritually alive.

I'm not a mathematician or a logician or a theologian. So I can say this--it's just what I think, it's word play. It doesn't have to be right. Or wrong. Or even original. It just is. Isn't that blogging? And with that, I'll add this lovely, wistful haiku:

the world of dew
is a world of dew,
and yet, and yet--.

Kobayashi Issa (1763 - 1827)

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